Warner Center Toastmasters

Don't Break The Seal Ann Philippon
Icebreaker March, 2006

Honored toastmaster, fellow toastmasters, and welcomed guests…

Let me give you an odd, but yet very sound piece of advice that I’ve discovered over the past year: never sit on a seal. Yes, I do mean seals, those slick critters you may see scrambling around on the beach or poking their noses out of the surf. And if I’m telling you that seals don’t like to be sat on (and they’re not the most discerning animals in the ocean), definitely never sit on a sea lion. Sea lions are much smarter and far more clever than your average seal, and they really won’t enjoy your company.

I’ve learned these valuable tips myself, but yet, nevertheless, week after week, that’s still how I’ve spent many Saturdays – sitting on seals and sea lions. Okay, I’ll admit, “sitting” isn’t exactly what we’re doing. It’s actually officially called “jumping,” and don’t worry, I don’t jump marine mammals for sport. I’m doing it as part of a much larger effort to care for sick, injured, and stranded seals and sea lions, and eventually return them back to the ocean where they belong.

I volunteer at the Marine Mammal Care Center in San Pedro every weekend. Besides providing a great service for these animals, the Center is also a wonderful place filled with dozens of generous, dedicated, and hard-working volunteers. These people return day after day to help with the endless process of checking-in, feeding, medicating, cleaning, and releasing a wide variety of seals and sea lions. And if you’ve ever seen these animals in person, you might guess that they are very messy and very hungry critters – and boy, would you be right!!

I started volunteering at the Center over a year ago, and honestly, I had absolutely no idea what I was getting myself into at the time. I should have known better though, when at the volunteer orientation, there was talk of skinning fish and rubber overalls.

All of the many warnings from the orientation did indeed come true. Within my first few hours at the Center, I was tossing fish guts into a blender. And within a few weeks of working there, I was fully geared up in rubber boots, rubber overalls, and even leather welding gloves! And that was just the beginning.

I soon mastered the art of cooking up a delectable batch of seal-pup gruel, which is a delightful mixture of fish parts, powdered milk, vitamins, and electrolytes – sounds yummy, right?!

Then without much warning, I also found myself working in the animal pens. And frankly, there were many times that I would have welcomed the chance to return to skinning fish!! It wasn’t so much the scrubbing, rinsing, and heavy lifting that was problematic. That is actually a pretty good workout. What took some getting used to was the mischievous stalking and curious bites from very hyper juvenile sea lions and even scarier 300-hundred pound adults (baring very sharp teeth, mind you). Thank goodness for protective gear!

Now let’s revisit the jumping, shall we? I thought they were kidding at first, but no, you really do have to learn how to tackle a seal or sea lion (literally), hold it down, and keep it immobile. While one person jumps, another volunteer places a long tube into the seal’s throat and injects food directly into its stomach. It sounds a little like torture, but in fact it’s a really important procedure that keeps many of these animals alive when they are too young or too sick to eat on their own.

By this point, I imagine that these all sound like very scary and unpleasant tasks – and often they can be. But this volunteer job has offered a lot more than just dirty grunt work and shots of adrenaline. Every Saturday I’m challenged in new ways both physically and mentally. I work with amazing people who care deeply about the environment and the wildlife it supports. And better yet, I have the opportunity to work up-close and personally with beautiful and intelligent wild animals that you don’t often encounter in the real world.

But the best part? You can’t imagine the satisfaction of one day jumping a very skinny and grumpy seal pup that’s been abandoned by its mother, teaching it how to catch fish a few weeks later, and then finally opening a kennel door on the beach and seeing a very healthy and fat seal waddle back into the surf where it belongs!

And oh yeah, did I mention that I know how to wrestle a seal? That’s just another unusual benefit that always provides a good conversation starter, if nothing else.

So, you’ve learned a little about me, and you’ve learned a little about taking care of sick marine mammals. But perhaps the most important information I’ve left you with is that now you know what not to do if you ever encounter a seal or a sea lion on the beach. Whatever you do, don’t sit on it. You and the seal will thank me.